Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Superior Stamina?

Did you ever notice this?
The music stops, signaling that the dancing has ended and the wedding will soon come to a close. Glance around the women's side, and you see the kallah's friends, limping around the room, nursing their injured feet. You might nod your head in sympathy, telling yourself that it makes sense. After all, these girls had really been mehudar the mitzvah of being mesameach the kallah. They danced all night, for all they were worth.
But then it hits you. From the other side of the mechitza, there is joyous singing and dancing. First, you start to think that they simply didn't notice that the music has ceased. But you reason that they most likely DID notice, and that they are simply enjoying themselves.
Strange contrasts, huh?
"The boys must have superior stamina" you conclude.
But deep inside, you know this doesn't ring true. Women are the ones who stand on their feet cooking, cleaning and sorting laundry. Women are the ones who manage to bathe a kid, mop the kitchen floor, mediate a fight between two toddlers, and bake a cake all at the same time. It's women who stay up half the night with a screaming baby, and then get up and go to work for eight hours.
So the answer can't be in the difference between men and women. What is it then?
Look down.
No. That's not a diversionary tactic. Look down, and you have your answer. Look at the shoes worn by men, as opposed to the torture devices that women wear under the guise of shoes.
And it all becomes clear. While the women have endured self inflicted torture for the last few hours, the men have merely danced. And so the man are more than happy to keep dancing but the women can barely limp to their cars and swerve home.
And so I ask you, women, why do you do it? Have you ever tried attending a chasunah with round-toed-flats? I have. Trust me, it's a different experience. And it's your chance to prove, for once and for all, that women really are more resilient than men are.

33 comments:

frum single female said...

i stopped wearing heels and open toe shoes to simchas years ago. heels are great for stabbing the feet of those who are wearing open toe shoes.
there is another option though. bring a pair of flats to wear during the dancing. ive seen others do this. as for me ill stick to flats. who i am kidding anyway. im five feet tall. 2 inch heels will only make me five foot two.

Scraps said...

I have. However, the fact that my round-toed flats get worn far more often also means they get stretched out far more quickly, so they're more likely to slip off my feet while dancing. I can keep dancing even in my heels. :)

Altie said...

lol. I hardly ever wear heels, I agree with you, don't hurt your feet for fashion. it's not worth it. But when i dance at weddings, i usually take off my shoes and put on socks. its more fun that way. but look out for the heels, if they step on your foot theyre likely to break something.
or you can go for the sneakers, i did that at my sisters wedding. under my long gown no one could tell, and i danced all night. yay!

EsPes said...

yay one more reason why i love "out of town"- no1 cares what shoes u wear to a wedding :-)

chanie said...

I've attended in sneakers. Those are what I intend to attend (no pun intended) my own wedding in, as well. Looks aren't worth a sore back.

Mikeinmidwood said...

You have a false world of expectations, its never gonna happen, women will always wear high heels and it will always kill their feet.

And as for us men, you dont think we are shvitzing? you dont think are legs are sore after stomping on the floor all night?

All day we are arguing business strategies or breaking up fights between abaye and rava, we got stamina.

Rikki said...

You actually went to a chasunah in round toed flats- and you want to get married?! (Btw I don't even own a pair of heels!)

Jessica said...

I always switch from my heels to tennis shoes (known to some as 'sneakers') for the dancing. ... but I've never actually seen the dancing on the women's side stop before the men's side. Usually the women go on just as long even with the heels.

Something Different said...

FSF- You wore open toed shoes to weddings and you are not a cripple? *shocked*
Why bring the flats when you can be comfy during the kabbalas panim/chuppah too? Oh, and I hear ye about the height. I have a very different issue with heels...

Scraps- So pointy toed- slingbacks with 3 inch spikes work for you? Wow....

Altie- I don't hurt anything for fashion. If beauty hurts I don't want any part in it... I wore the world's most comfortable shoes to my sister's wedding, but even I wouldn't wear them to a wedding where my feet will show...

EP- one more comment like that from you and I am moving out! :-P

Chanie- Good for you! Am I invited? ;)

MIM- This woman doesn't kill her feet for anything. Oh pullese! You try dancing on pointy stilts all night and tell me that there is no difference!
Yes, but it's stamina of a different sort...

Rikki- Can you imagine?? Guess if I have ever been to a wedding in a pony? Bingo!
(btw, what about points?)

Jessica- I mean when the wedding has officially "ended" and the band is packing up. You have never seen that? I have seen it a few times.

chanie said...

SD- yes, you're invited. And I 100% agree- if beauty hurts, I have no part in it. Nice to know I'm not alone. :)

Something Different said...

Chanie- awesome! And you are invited to mine. The date is TBA because my prince's limo got a flat tire so it's taking him a while to get here...
Bout not allowing beauty to hurt you- well congrats! You can officially consider yourself different. ;)

Inspired said...

I know someone who does not like to wear flats, feels more comfortable with heels!!

EsPes said...

ur invited to move here any time! :-)

Something Different said...

Insp- um...different strokes for different folks I guess... ;)

EP- well, I'd have to decide between there and scraps's hometown of yehupitzville. Unless they're the same place, which would be hilarious. ;)

EsPes said...

pick me! pick me!

Mikeinmidwood said...

Okay DS I challenge you, I will were those high heels, and dance for two or three hours. Besides the fact that I will look weird, I would have no problem.

chanie said...

SD- I like the mashal. :)
My date is TBA because we pushed it off, lol. But it's good to be different... (I asked if I should wear makeup at the wedding, and was requested not to...)

Inspired- possibly, because if they don't stand straight normally, heels force them to do so, and/or help them.

But re squashed toes, I keep planning to make a sign to wear that says "Do not smash toes. Fine: 1000 sh"ch". I keep forgetting, though.

Something Different said...

EP- you won't even tell me where you live....!

MIM- yeah, that'll be some sight... You have to try the spiky heels with the extreme pointy toes. Dance for hours in those and then we can talk.

Chanie- In case you haven't noticed I have a rather active imagination, and that leads to things like that...sigh.
You're right about smashed toes. When I become president I intend to outlaw spiky heels, and have them considered lethal weapons. ;-)

EN said...

Love your blog! I've been reading it for quite a while and enjoy your optimisim, it makes me feel like dancing :-)

Something Different said...

EN- woohoo! Thanks a million! Comments like that make me feel like dancing... :-p

chanie said...

SD- It's good to have an active imagination, then...wish mine were so blessed.

nmf #7 said...

Heh. My husband never quite understands why we torture ourselves with heels in the first place.
Agreeing with MIM's comment- they have stamina...
Thank G-d I live in Israel, and everyone wears flats.

Jacob Da Jew said...

Lets see: The women generally either work or chase kids all day so they're tired.

But the men (and I'm referring to the yeshiva students) sit on their tucheses all day so they have a lot more energy when it comes time to boogie.

Personally, I can't jump around when I've been on my feet for the past 10 hours.

Something Different said...

Chanie- B"H. It's one of my favorite things about me. And I certainly thank Hashem for it...

NMF- we? Who's we? I don't wear heels. And yes, they have stamina, but it's of a different sort. And who cares what everyone wears? I wear flats regardless. :-)

JDJ- I am talking about single girls mostly, and we- well, ok we do work and some chase kids (students) but still, I think it has more to do with the horrible footgear women wear.

EN said...

Glad I can give that feeling back to you, who gives it to me on a daily basis :-), at least once :-)
Where do you get your inspiration?

Something Different said...

EN- yikes, I'm scared. Do you know me? If so, please email me, justablob (at) gmail dot com

EN said...

No I don't have the pleasure of knowing you in real life, but i feel inspired by your writing because I also have my little secret ;-)

EN said...

To clarify, what I meant was that your blog gives me chizuk on a daily basis. (I'm hooked on your writing)

Something Different said...

EN- now I am thoroughly confused. You really don't know me in real life? Not through email either? And what is your little secret? Are you gonna tell me or keep me in suspense?
And I am glad my blog gives you chizuk. Really I am. A dad surprised cuz I don't think that the majority of my posts are very chizuk-y but if you enjoy em...
Please comment often! As you may know, I love comments! :-)

harry-er than them all said...

all this time i thought guys were just superior,plain...lol

Something Different said...

HTTA- uh uh. That's what I was trying to say. Not.
Imagine...you've been mislead all these years...

C said...

I actually like wearing heels. My problem is that I'm tall, so wearing heels is bad for my shidduch prospects. But I refuse to give them up.

Something Different said...

C- spikey ones? Oiy vey! That's...odd. But if you like them, why would you not wear them? Who cares about shidduchim?? (I don't know how much of my blog you've read, as I don't remember seeing you before, but I just wrote a post about that.) Or do you mean when you are actually on a date with a guy that you were told is your height, and you don't wan to make him look shorter than you...?