I was standing in line outside of traffic court, head bent, eyes downcast, trying my best to look apologetic. I was conducting a whispered conversation with a friend, trying not to let the rest of the line into my personal life. Suddenly, I was disrupted by a man who obviously didn't share my personal philosophy on public versus private phone conversations.
He seemed to be conversing with his wife. I was a little annoyed by his loud tone of voice, but he looked about sixty years my senior, so I figured it was only fair to respect his failing hearing. The man told his wife, in numerous loud, perhaps even yelled sentences, that he is standing in line at traffic court. "Yeah, so I'm here, standing in line. Yeah....exactly.....yeah so I'm here in line with my fellow criminals." At that point, he looked around the line to see who was chuckling at his lame humor. I too, looked around the line, and saw that nobody found him funny. I took pity on him and chuckled. He looked at me excitedly, then proceeded to tell his wife that people (he must have been seeing double) are finding him funny.
Tho conversation continued on for a while, and it was memorable enough for me to re-enact for my father later that day. I mentioned that there was something that struck me as odd, perhaps amusing, about the whole situation, but that I couldn't quite place it. My father's response was so on target I couldn't get over it.
"Some people still haven't figured out that it's no longer cool to have a cell phone."
Isn't it true? Similar to the way a new driver expects admiring eyes from all other drivers, as he has passed his road test, this man wanted us to know he recently bought a cell phone. Yet, just as the new driver fails to realize that all those other drivers have obviously passed their road tests also, the man failed to notice one key detail; his fellow criminals (his joke, not mine) were too busy making phone calls, texting friends, typing emails, and surfing the web, all on their cell phones of course, to notice his new toy.
It's kinda like my father's first email enabled device. Now, granted that old dinosaur was a far cry from today's sophisticated blackberries, PDAs and smartphones, but he was still able to knock the socks off of a lot of people who were still using their phones for nothing but phone calls. (For the children reading this, yes, there was a time, actually not that long ago, when a phone was just a phone. It wasn't a camera, web browser, mp3 player, texting machine, gameboy and phone all rolled into one!) Nowadays, a person with the oh-this-is-so-cool-I-can-get-email-right-on-my-cell-phone mentality is nothing but a fool.
Suddenly, with this realization, a lot of behaviors make so much more sense. The kid who hasn't figured out that many people have friends. The housewife who hasn't figured out that dishwashers are no longer a rarity. The guy who still thinks an Internet connection is up and coming technology. Often people are behind the times, and so all they want is to be noticed.
My proposed solution: give them the attention. After you inflate their ego a bit, feel free to show her that you also have a dishwasher.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Top Ten Tuesday: Top Ten Things You Should Know
10) Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly top ten list.
9) Top Ten Tuesday will be published weekly, except when it's not. I will try to post one each week, but putting pressure on is a sure way to generate writer's block, so there are no promises.
8) Top Ten Tuesday is not guaranteed to be funny.
7) Top Ten Tuesday is not guaranteed to be original.
6) Top Ten Tuesday is free, a public service to the general population of the world. Please enjoy it.
5) Top Ten Tuesday might be serious sometimes. Like I said, no promises or guarantees.
4) Top Ten Tuesday is probably not an original idea. I did think of it without help though. Get over it.
3) Top Ten Tuesday is gonna be great. Read it. You know you want to.
2) Top Ten Tuesday is interactive. After I post my ten, please feel free to add to my list.
1) Top Ten Tuesday is listening to you. If you want to see a top ten list on a topic, please email me. :-)
Shame I don't have ten of my previous top (ten) lists, but here they are:
Which Top Ten lists do you want to see here?
Monday, August 3, 2009
Playing Mommy
I always thought motherhood was really easy. Seriously, there are millions of mothers out there, and only about half of them have gone insane. So I set off with Cutie and Fatso, two of my nieces, determined to be the world's best babysitter. Turns out.....
Hours later, I'm sprawled out in bed, while Cutie and Fatso are sitting at my desk, watching Marvelous Middos Machine on my laptop. I know their Tatty doesn't like them to watch vi-ee-ohs, but under the circumstances, I don't have much of a choice.
A few fun things about spending a day with the kids:
I can recite the entire Marvelous Middos Machine Songtape. (All good deeds should be done right away!) This, of course is courtesy of a very knowledgable young lady. ("No, SD, I don't like Lipa! No! Don't like shwekey either!)
I can't move my left arm...she ain't called fatso for nothing. And Cutie was insulted that I didn't have a double stroller for her, so we compromised: I carried her for five blocks, then she walked for one...
Joy can be found in the simplest things. Telling kids that FAO Schwartz is a toy museum is an old trick. Following that train of logic, the American Doll Place is a wonderful doll museum. We were nervous that they'd catch on and demand everything and anything, but I was amused and amazed that the kids were thrilled to run up and down the stairs, and take pictures of the dollies. I can't help but wonder how much happier we'd all be if we could learn to enjoy the little things....just like the little ones.
Kids rebound so quickly. They race around, fall flat on their face, cry for a minute, then they get up, smile and continue playing.
Kids are not easy to fool. I told my niece that I'd get her a small milkshake. That didn't work. "No, I need a big one cuz I'm so big!" it's hard to argue with such logic...
My day was exhausting, and I'm ready to give up. But then, I had to stop midway through writing this to pick up Fatso, who had fallen on the floor. She snuggled up in my arms, her thumb firmly in her mouth, her eyes closed, her arms wrapped around me. Then I knew...motherhood is tough, kids are tough, but all good things come at a price.
See you later....I'm off to play with the kids again!
(Please note: if this post seems like it was written by a person who was half asleep...it was. Excuse me. I played mommy today.)
Hours later, I'm sprawled out in bed, while Cutie and Fatso are sitting at my desk, watching Marvelous Middos Machine on my laptop. I know their Tatty doesn't like them to watch vi-ee-ohs, but under the circumstances, I don't have much of a choice.
A few fun things about spending a day with the kids:
I can recite the entire Marvelous Middos Machine Songtape. (All good deeds should be done right away!) This, of course is courtesy of a very knowledgable young lady. ("No, SD, I don't like Lipa! No! Don't like shwekey either!)
I can't move my left arm...she ain't called fatso for nothing. And Cutie was insulted that I didn't have a double stroller for her, so we compromised: I carried her for five blocks, then she walked for one...
Joy can be found in the simplest things. Telling kids that FAO Schwartz is a toy museum is an old trick. Following that train of logic, the American Doll Place is a wonderful doll museum. We were nervous that they'd catch on and demand everything and anything, but I was amused and amazed that the kids were thrilled to run up and down the stairs, and take pictures of the dollies. I can't help but wonder how much happier we'd all be if we could learn to enjoy the little things....just like the little ones.
Kids rebound so quickly. They race around, fall flat on their face, cry for a minute, then they get up, smile and continue playing.
Kids are not easy to fool. I told my niece that I'd get her a small milkshake. That didn't work. "No, I need a big one cuz I'm so big!" it's hard to argue with such logic...
My day was exhausting, and I'm ready to give up. But then, I had to stop midway through writing this to pick up Fatso, who had fallen on the floor. She snuggled up in my arms, her thumb firmly in her mouth, her eyes closed, her arms wrapped around me. Then I knew...motherhood is tough, kids are tough, but all good things come at a price.
See you later....I'm off to play with the kids again!
(Please note: if this post seems like it was written by a person who was half asleep...it was. Excuse me. I played mommy today.)
Sunday, August 2, 2009
What Do I Love?
Inkstainedhands tagged me in this meme.
I gotta say, I find memes funny. I mean, by definition, bloggers talk about themselves. So why do we need memes to get us talking? Well either way, here are seven things I love. I tried to keep people, spirituality, and shallow things off my list, so it was hard. I mean, naturally, I love my parents, I love G-d and the Torah, and I love ice cream. I'm not sure what love is supposed to mean in this situation, nor do I love my parents the same way I love ice cream. That being said, here is my interpretation of the situation: (like I always say, satisfaction guaranteed or your money back!)
1) I love the feeling that I worked hard on something...and my efforts came to fruition.
2) I love making other people laugh.
3) I love writing. Any kind of writing.
4) I love spending time with old friends. (New friends who are reading this, don't get insulted! I love spending time with you too! :-)
5) I love cuddling a new born baby.
6) I love watching the rain falling outside when I am enveloped by the warmth, shelter and safety of my house.
7) I love when people come out of their lurkiness and tell me that they are reading my blog! (I especially love it when they don't do it as "anonymous")
I'm supposed to tag people now,i'm guessing seven of them, but I've always been different. I'm just gonna tag everyone to do this...why not? (In other words, I'm on my iPod and can't put in links and anyway I'm sure most people who want to do this already did...but if you do chose to tell us about yourself in seven random tidbits, please leave a comment in lieu of a link.)
I gotta say, I find memes funny. I mean, by definition, bloggers talk about themselves. So why do we need memes to get us talking? Well either way, here are seven things I love. I tried to keep people, spirituality, and shallow things off my list, so it was hard. I mean, naturally, I love my parents, I love G-d and the Torah, and I love ice cream. I'm not sure what love is supposed to mean in this situation, nor do I love my parents the same way I love ice cream. That being said, here is my interpretation of the situation: (like I always say, satisfaction guaranteed or your money back!)
1) I love the feeling that I worked hard on something...and my efforts came to fruition.
2) I love making other people laugh.
3) I love writing. Any kind of writing.
4) I love spending time with old friends. (New friends who are reading this, don't get insulted! I love spending time with you too! :-)
5) I love cuddling a new born baby.
6) I love watching the rain falling outside when I am enveloped by the warmth, shelter and safety of my house.
7) I love when people come out of their lurkiness and tell me that they are reading my blog! (I especially love it when they don't do it as "anonymous")
I'm supposed to tag people now,i'm guessing seven of them, but I've always been different. I'm just gonna tag everyone to do this...why not? (In other words, I'm on my iPod and can't put in links and anyway I'm sure most people who want to do this already did...but if you do chose to tell us about yourself in seven random tidbits, please leave a comment in lieu of a link.)
Friday, July 31, 2009
A Public Service From BOSD: 50 Topics For Discussion on Dates
The post you've all been waiting for! Many thanks to all those who submitted ideas. If you have additional ideas, please either post them as comments on this post, or email me.
Please note: these topics are satisfaction guaranteed or your money back. Oh, wait, they are free? Oh, well I guess they aint guaranteed after all. Use em at your own risk!
This list is in no specific order, and some topics are best discussed on later dates.
Hatzlacha!
2) Teachers/ Rabbeim/ Professors
3) School/ Yeshivah/ Seminary/ College
4) Family
5) Israel
6) Politics
7) News
8) Current Events
9) Art
10) Language
11) Music
12) Science
13) Intriguing things
14) Pictures on the wall
15) Goals
16) Priorities
17) Stories
18) Views
19) Dreams
20) Interesting things you have seen
21) Interests
22) Hobbies
23) Ambiance of room/ Hotel/ Venue
24) Food
25) Blood(!)
26) Why you chose the school you went to
27) Glasses/ Contacts
28) Purim
29) Pesach
30) Shavuos
31) Chanukah
32) Yomim Noraim
33) Sukos
34) Shabbos
35) Travel
36) Jewish Geography
37) Sibling's personality
38) Parent's personality
39) Which middos are you machshiv
40) What values do your parents emphasize in their house?
41) What values do you plan to emphasize in yours?
42) What do you believe is the purpose of life?
43) What are you looking for in a spouse?
44) Why do you want to get married?
45) Jokes
46) Dating itself
47) Shopping
48) Family minhagim
49) Books
50) If all else fails, discuss BOSD!
Friday, July 24, 2009
Top Ten Ways You Know It's Bein Hazmanim
10) The bigger cholent pots needs to be shlepped up from the basement.
9) Beer occupies the best spots in the fridge.
8) The toilet seat is up.
7) There are hats on every couch/comfortable seat in the house.
6) Dead bugs appear all over the house. Girls may possess the decorating skill required to figure out that dead bugs on the wall should be removed, but apparently guys haven't figured that out.
5) You don't need to take the garbage out. You just need to yell and scream, beg and plead, and tear out your hair in frustration, until you finally convince your little bocher'l to do it.
4) Loud alarm clocks going off all morning, courtesy of a yeshivah bochur who can sleep through an earthquake. (My theory is that they set alarm clocks to wake up the rest of the house who will come to their rooms and turn their mattresses over.)
3) The ketchup bottles empty themselves.
2) There are tools strewn about in random places. And the crowning glory: a drill laying across the floor like it's some piece of artwork.
1) The car is nowhere to be found. Well, not no where. Try looking outside the local open-late takeout store.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
A Published Author!
The magazine came in the mail. I took it in and tore open the envelope. I flipped through the pages as quickly as my overly excited fingers would allow. Finally, having found the article I was so eagerly looking for, I read the familiar words with an overwhelming sense of déjà vu.
You see, I wrote it. I remembered reading those words before. I remembered reading them over and over, at least ten times before I pressed the send button. And then there was no turning back. Someone had suggested that I write an article on a particular topic in a particular publication. First, I reacted with skepticism. Me?
But I approached it the way I approach most things in life. If other people can do it, so can I. And so, just as I fought myself how to play a flute, bake hamentashen, write meta tags, and analyze handwriting, I decided to write that article. All over the world there are millions of people who write articles, and I would be one of them.
And I wrote...and wrote...and wrote.
And then I read...and read...and read.
And when I was confident that it was the best I could do, I clicked send.
It was a while later that I heard back from them, but the answer was positive.
Another agonizing wait...and I became, for the first time in my adult life, a published author.
The feeling is exhilarating. As small and unknown is this paper is, there ARE people out there who are reading what I wrote. It's given me a boost. I want to continue writing. I want to experience this again The marvelous feeling of looking at the work of the graphic designer and deciding if it compliments my writing. The utter exhiliration of knowing some inside bit of information, of reading an article and knowing what its going to say.
Has anyone else had their writing published? Does anyone else know this feeling?
You see, I wrote it. I remembered reading those words before. I remembered reading them over and over, at least ten times before I pressed the send button. And then there was no turning back. Someone had suggested that I write an article on a particular topic in a particular publication. First, I reacted with skepticism. Me?
But I approached it the way I approach most things in life. If other people can do it, so can I. And so, just as I fought myself how to play a flute, bake hamentashen, write meta tags, and analyze handwriting, I decided to write that article. All over the world there are millions of people who write articles, and I would be one of them.
And I wrote...and wrote...and wrote.
And then I read...and read...and read.
And when I was confident that it was the best I could do, I clicked send.
It was a while later that I heard back from them, but the answer was positive.
Another agonizing wait...and I became, for the first time in my adult life, a published author.
The feeling is exhilarating. As small and unknown is this paper is, there ARE people out there who are reading what I wrote. It's given me a boost. I want to continue writing. I want to experience this again The marvelous feeling of looking at the work of the graphic designer and deciding if it compliments my writing. The utter exhiliration of knowing some inside bit of information, of reading an article and knowing what its going to say.
Has anyone else had their writing published? Does anyone else know this feeling?
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Old People And Technology Don't Mix
I was once browsing through some birthday cards (am I the only one who can spend hours in the card section of a store?) and I found a card that made me wish my mother's birthday's was that week. On the front, it had a picture of a girl holding a cell phone. It said:
"Mom, what if, for your birthday I programmed your cell phone to ring to happy birthday?"
Inside, it said:
"You wouldn't be able to do anything about it, huh?"
It's funny, isn't it? There have been many jokes about technology and old people...for good reason. Take the famous quote from Groucho Marx: "A child of five would understand this. Somebody fetch a child a five." Now, I doubt Groucho was looking for somebody to change the ring tone on his cell phone, but the phenomenon seems to be old. Isn't it scary what happens when a person gets old?
This is the point at which I am hoping my mother doesn't ever find my blog, as she thinks she is very young. I have tried explaining this to her many times. "Ma, you're allowed to be old. You're a grandmother!" She doesn't buy that though. She thinks she is young. After all, she has a blackberry! I haven't yet had the heart to tell her that a blackberry doesn't make one young. On the other hand, a blackberry with over 30o unread emails, courtesy of an owner who can't figure out how to open an email on it...makes one something very un-young. And then, they get their new phone, and you can ask to borrow their car for a month straight if you want it, because without you, your parents can't change the wallpaper, the ring tone, or even figure out how to get to their contacts.
What is it about age that makes people lose touch with modern technology? It's not like kids just learn to use the technology of their era, and then lose it. Kids keep up to date with advances, while middle age (plus) people are left fumbling with their dinosaurs on the wayside. And then, those kids grow up and they start to tinker with dinosaurs while their kids send each other text messages making fun of their silly looking parents.
All I know is this. I sincerely hope I can age gracefully. When I get old, I don't want to be found tinkering with the next generation's version of a blackberry, sneaking peaks at the manual when I think no one is looking.
Someone, show this to me in 45 years, ok?
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Pre-Date Jitters: A View From The Other Side
I've often watched a woman in the midst of pre-date jitters. It has never been a pretty sight, be the woman a sister or friend. Some are anxious to a dizzying degree. They go to each mirror in the house, to see how their makeup will look in different lighting. They try on every pair of shoes they own, trying to determine which is best. (this can take a really long time, depending on her level of Perfection.) They iron out invisible crimps in their hair, while simultaneously fretting about non-existent creases in their black suit.
There are those that get all spiritual from their nervousness. They sit and say tehillim, ignoring their surroundings, praying that the next three to five hours pass as quickly as possible. They sit and pray with such fervor, you have to hope that they won't miss the guy at their door.
Some girls go irritable pre-date. They are the ones that make you want to scream something like "Nobody said you have to go out! It's your decision! And even if it's not, it wasn't my fault so go fight with somebody else!" Then there are the ones who go super-sweet pre-date. If they are normally really un-sweet, they can be really disconcerting. They make you want to say "who are you and what have you done with my sister?" Sometimes I wonder if they think that the zechus of their sweetness will make their date go more smoothly.
One thing I never though about though, was the guy. I mean, he has a pre-date time too. And as many ties as a guy has to chose from, there can't be much fussing about his looks. Instead, does he fuss over the gemorah the father might be asking him about?
Then there is another factor the boy has to consider, and that's the timing. He can't get there early, as that would appear seriously OCD. (Not to mention really nasty. One boy missed my mother because he came ten minutes early. This was after pushing the date off by a week because she was in Israel when they were going to go on the first date.) He can't come too late either. That seems careless. (One of my sisters dated a boy who came over and hour late for each date. I commented that if she ever gets engaged to him, we will have to call the chupah for 2 in the afternoon if we want to have it before midnight.) But timing can be tough, especially if the girl lives quite a distance from the boy's starting point.
So what made me think of all this, suddenly? Well the other day I got my answer to the boy's timing. I was parked in front of a convenience store/takeout store, which also serves as a quasi hangout for yeshivah guys. I was waiting for someone there, so I had an opportunity to observe the scene from the relative comfort and security of my car.
I watched as a young man, dressed in a neat suit and classy tie walked into the store. It was clear from his manner that he was more than a little nervous. He walked around the store, looked around, and as far as I could see, bought nothing. As the guy walked out of the store, and into his clean, nice-looking car, I looked at my clock and realized the simple reason for this odd behavior: it was 6:56 pm. Surely, in some house not too far away, there was a young lady, consumed by intense pre-date jitters, scurrying around the house, trying to get ready for her seven o'clock date.
I don't think I'll ever look at pre-date jitters the same way.
There are those that get all spiritual from their nervousness. They sit and say tehillim, ignoring their surroundings, praying that the next three to five hours pass as quickly as possible. They sit and pray with such fervor, you have to hope that they won't miss the guy at their door.
Some girls go irritable pre-date. They are the ones that make you want to scream something like "Nobody said you have to go out! It's your decision! And even if it's not, it wasn't my fault so go fight with somebody else!" Then there are the ones who go super-sweet pre-date. If they are normally really un-sweet, they can be really disconcerting. They make you want to say "who are you and what have you done with my sister?" Sometimes I wonder if they think that the zechus of their sweetness will make their date go more smoothly.
One thing I never though about though, was the guy. I mean, he has a pre-date time too. And as many ties as a guy has to chose from, there can't be much fussing about his looks. Instead, does he fuss over the gemorah the father might be asking him about?
Then there is another factor the boy has to consider, and that's the timing. He can't get there early, as that would appear seriously OCD. (Not to mention really nasty. One boy missed my mother because he came ten minutes early. This was after pushing the date off by a week because she was in Israel when they were going to go on the first date.) He can't come too late either. That seems careless. (One of my sisters dated a boy who came over and hour late for each date. I commented that if she ever gets engaged to him, we will have to call the chupah for 2 in the afternoon if we want to have it before midnight.) But timing can be tough, especially if the girl lives quite a distance from the boy's starting point.
So what made me think of all this, suddenly? Well the other day I got my answer to the boy's timing. I was parked in front of a convenience store/takeout store, which also serves as a quasi hangout for yeshivah guys. I was waiting for someone there, so I had an opportunity to observe the scene from the relative comfort and security of my car.
I watched as a young man, dressed in a neat suit and classy tie walked into the store. It was clear from his manner that he was more than a little nervous. He walked around the store, looked around, and as far as I could see, bought nothing. As the guy walked out of the store, and into his clean, nice-looking car, I looked at my clock and realized the simple reason for this odd behavior: it was 6:56 pm. Surely, in some house not too far away, there was a young lady, consumed by intense pre-date jitters, scurrying around the house, trying to get ready for her seven o'clock date.
I don't think I'll ever look at pre-date jitters the same way.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Bumping Into a Couple On a Date
My first reaction was "how odd."
I was on vacation, in a city with a miniscule Frum population. I mean, it's ironic that a gal from a place with a really large frum population, such as the one where I live, has to go on vacation a couple of hundred miles away to meet a couple on a date.
The scene was comical. The girl took one look at me and turned a brilliant shade of green. The boy even had the good grace to blush. Me? I was trying not to laugh. This wasn't a one-second encounter. This was a I'm-sorry-I-didn't-plan-things-this-way. The poor kids, they sat there in silence, perhaps conversing telapathically. I can just hear the conversation: "we should probably wait till she's not in earshot before we resume talking." "Yeah I was thinking the same thing!" "cool! Is this what they call chemistry?"
Personally I was sending them telapathic messages too, "don't worry. I don't know you. Really, I don't know anyone who lives her, you are safe. It's ok."
I don't think they got the message. They just sat there in their awkward silence, willing me to disappear. I didn't, but I do like to imagine that they went on to get engaged, and married, and eventually have 15 kids. I like to imagine the kids sitting around the shabbos table, and little Yanky saying "tatty, can you tell us the story of how you were on a first date with mommy and this weird girl was there and you were so embarrassed?" Then little Rivkala chimes in "yes, tatty, can you PLEASE say it!" Not to be outdone, Sarah Leah says "Tatty, PLEASE? it's my favorite story!" So Tatty sighs, and starts the story... "Well, kinderlach, you see, before mommy was married, she lived in [insert name of mildly popular vacation area] and I went up there to go on a date with her. I picked her up, but things weren't going too well. We didn't have too much to talk about. But then we went down to the water and there was this strange girl there. I'm not sure exactly what made her strange, but she was laughing too much. Anyway, mommy and me didn't talk while she was around, which was a while. But as soon as she left we burst out laughing, and that was the beginning of things. Now we're married with 15 kids, so I guess it all worked out."
"But tatty, what ever happened to the girl?" questions little Hindy. "I don't know zeeskeit, but I'm pretty sure she forgot all about it."
Either way, that's not the only time I bumped into dating couples. Once, I was stuck in traffic, we're talking non-moving FDR kind of misery, and I found it pretty amusing that a majority of the time I was parallel to a couple that was no doubt on a date. They didn't look to thrilled about me staring into their car for an hour, or maybe they simply weren't thrilled with each other. I was thinking that he looked like a very eligible young man (or perhaps he was simply driving a very eligible new car) and maybe it would be a good idea for me to roll down my window and let him know I'm available. I took pity on the poor girl though, and remained content sitting looking into their car and analyzing the situation.
On another occasion, my sisters and I went out to eat. Just as we walked into the restaurant, my sister's face lit up in a special way. "Splendid. That's my friend, and she is obviously on a date." the guy got up, and the girl beckoned my sister to come to her table. "This guy is SO not for me, I can't wait till this date is over." Personally, I found it funny. Why did the guy waste his money taking her to such a fancy restaurant so early on, before he knows if she's worth all that money? I wonder if it wasn't as bad as the girl made it seem. Perhaps she was just embarrassed at the situation, and figured that statement was the surest way to make sure that we wouldn't publicize our little meeting.
My sister had a great story along these lines. She was on a date, and they met another dating couple in the park they were walking in. The couple looked extra radiant, and they confided in my sister and her Prince Not-So-Charming. "We just got engaged!! The two of you are the first to know about it!!!" My sister and her date congratulated them, and then it got awkward. The girl looked at my sister with searching eyes. They were asking "and you two?" My sister tried to signal back with her eyes, to let her know that Miss Kallah might be in the company of Mr. Right, but MG's date was sadly Mr. Wrong.
What do you do when you meet a couple on a date? Ignore them? Pretend you don't realize it's a date? (i.e. ask how they know each other)
Have you had any great stories when this happened?
I was on vacation, in a city with a miniscule Frum population. I mean, it's ironic that a gal from a place with a really large frum population, such as the one where I live, has to go on vacation a couple of hundred miles away to meet a couple on a date.
The scene was comical. The girl took one look at me and turned a brilliant shade of green. The boy even had the good grace to blush. Me? I was trying not to laugh. This wasn't a one-second encounter. This was a I'm-sorry-I-didn't-plan-things-this-way. The poor kids, they sat there in silence, perhaps conversing telapathically. I can just hear the conversation: "we should probably wait till she's not in earshot before we resume talking." "Yeah I was thinking the same thing!" "cool! Is this what they call chemistry?"
Personally I was sending them telapathic messages too, "don't worry. I don't know you. Really, I don't know anyone who lives her, you are safe. It's ok."
I don't think they got the message. They just sat there in their awkward silence, willing me to disappear. I didn't, but I do like to imagine that they went on to get engaged, and married, and eventually have 15 kids. I like to imagine the kids sitting around the shabbos table, and little Yanky saying "tatty, can you tell us the story of how you were on a first date with mommy and this weird girl was there and you were so embarrassed?" Then little Rivkala chimes in "yes, tatty, can you PLEASE say it!" Not to be outdone, Sarah Leah says "Tatty, PLEASE? it's my favorite story!" So Tatty sighs, and starts the story... "Well, kinderlach, you see, before mommy was married, she lived in [insert name of mildly popular vacation area] and I went up there to go on a date with her. I picked her up, but things weren't going too well. We didn't have too much to talk about. But then we went down to the water and there was this strange girl there. I'm not sure exactly what made her strange, but she was laughing too much. Anyway, mommy and me didn't talk while she was around, which was a while. But as soon as she left we burst out laughing, and that was the beginning of things. Now we're married with 15 kids, so I guess it all worked out."
"But tatty, what ever happened to the girl?" questions little Hindy. "I don't know zeeskeit, but I'm pretty sure she forgot all about it."
Either way, that's not the only time I bumped into dating couples. Once, I was stuck in traffic, we're talking non-moving FDR kind of misery, and I found it pretty amusing that a majority of the time I was parallel to a couple that was no doubt on a date. They didn't look to thrilled about me staring into their car for an hour, or maybe they simply weren't thrilled with each other. I was thinking that he looked like a very eligible young man (or perhaps he was simply driving a very eligible new car) and maybe it would be a good idea for me to roll down my window and let him know I'm available. I took pity on the poor girl though, and remained content sitting looking into their car and analyzing the situation.
On another occasion, my sisters and I went out to eat. Just as we walked into the restaurant, my sister's face lit up in a special way. "Splendid. That's my friend, and she is obviously on a date." the guy got up, and the girl beckoned my sister to come to her table. "This guy is SO not for me, I can't wait till this date is over." Personally, I found it funny. Why did the guy waste his money taking her to such a fancy restaurant so early on, before he knows if she's worth all that money? I wonder if it wasn't as bad as the girl made it seem. Perhaps she was just embarrassed at the situation, and figured that statement was the surest way to make sure that we wouldn't publicize our little meeting.
My sister had a great story along these lines. She was on a date, and they met another dating couple in the park they were walking in. The couple looked extra radiant, and they confided in my sister and her Prince Not-So-Charming. "We just got engaged!! The two of you are the first to know about it!!!" My sister and her date congratulated them, and then it got awkward. The girl looked at my sister with searching eyes. They were asking "and you two?" My sister tried to signal back with her eyes, to let her know that Miss Kallah might be in the company of Mr. Right, but MG's date was sadly Mr. Wrong.
What do you do when you meet a couple on a date? Ignore them? Pretend you don't realize it's a date? (i.e. ask how they know each other)
Have you had any great stories when this happened?
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