Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Top Ten Things I Learned During My Trip To Israel

10) Israeli gum is absolutely delicious: I brought back about fifty, perhaps sixty packages of gum, none of which are available in America, all of which are delicious. Anyone wanna go into the importing business with me?

9) I would be ultra skinny if I lived in Israel: Those hills are killers. ‘Nuff said.

8) Don’t ever attempt a ten hour plane ride without music: This is self explanatory. The plane ride there was about fifty million times more pleasant, simply because I turned my ipod up to the highest volume and drowned the world out.

7) I found Feivish! I couldn't believe it! All of these ads asking where the little fella was, and all along he was sitting on the side of a bus in Israel!

6) I can get a tan! : I shocked myself. Just one day at the beach and I have more color than I ever got in years on sitting under the American sun.

5) When in Israel, push as the Israelis do: This was obviously most evident in Meron, where pushing was the name of the game. But in general, I never found myself to be a pushy sort of person, until I found myself in a country full of people who’s mentality is simply: push.

4) Israelis don’t drink enough coffee: I stepped off the plane, and immediately wanted a coffee. Over the course of the following ten days, I went into countless stores, hoping and begging for a proper sized cup of American coffee, but to no avail. In Israel, a large cup of coffee would barely be a tall! Sigh. I could never live there.

3) I can, apparently, speak Hebrew when absolutely necessary: One of my travel companions speaks a fluent Hebrew, so she acted as my translator the entire trip. Again and again, I insisted “I don’t speak a word of Hebrew.” I shouldn’t admit this in a public forum, so as not to highly embarrass my former safah and dikduk teachers, but I really didn’t think I could speak a word. Then, one day, my Hebrew speaking friend couldn’t come with us. And that left me. To talk to non-english speaking Israelis. With no help. And shockingly, I really managed. Take that, Rebbetzin Dikduk!

2) Souvenirs kill vacations: My sister in law made a specific request for a present (something which actually made me really upset, fyi.). I ordered her present, then realized that I had a problem. I now had an obligation to purchase something for every family member, lest someone get insulted… The night before I left found me prowling the streets of Me’a Shearim, muttering “but what should I get her?” under my breath. I hereby declare that I will purchase no gifts for anyone, on any future trips I take.

1) The best way to find out if someone speaks Hebrew is to say something bizzare in front of them: I found this out when I was walking in the street with my friend, trying to find someone from whom we could ask directions. Instead of asking if people speak English, I merely said some weird, nonsensical things and looked around to see who was staring strangely at me.

Anyway, jetlag is nearly better, so perhaps some posts will emerge one of these days...


Mystery Woman said...

When I was in Israel about 2 years ago, the ice cream there was the best ever. The chalav yisroel ice cream here didn't come close. But it got here eventually about a year later. So there's hope for your gum.

Something Different said...

MW- I actually plan on bringing some of the gum I braught to the local candy store to see if they can get it in. Can't hurt to try...

itsagift said...

I like this list. :-)

10-Which brand of gum did you buy that you liked so much? What's better than your yellow orbit sugar free gum? lol

9-Couldn't agree more. The walking there is great for building up muscles, awesome exercise!

8-You didn't sleep on the plane?

7-You make me laugh! That's too good!

3-Yup, that's what happens, when push comes to shove and there's no one else to do it, you just learn to communicate!

2-Totally agree with that! It's so hard to find the right gift for each person. When I was there, I made it simple and bought each family member a Parker Pen with their name on it. This way, there was no "s/he got something better than me" and everyone was happy.

1-That's such a good one! Love it!

And I agree with MW-the ice cream there is the BEST! I remember going on a trip to Teveria with some friends and having more than double portions at the ice cream shop (I'm embarrassed to say how much I had!:-p)! But I don't know if that says so much cuz I love ice cream (and almost any food for that matter) and can eat loads of it at any time. But truthfully, Israeli ice cream does have a special taste! Yum!

MY Design said...

Sounds like you had an awesome trip!! Welcome Back!!