Thursday, July 16, 2009

Bumping Into a Couple On a Date

My first reaction was "how odd."
I was on vacation, in a city with a miniscule Frum population. I mean, it's ironic that a gal from a place with a really large frum population, such as the one where I live, has to go on vacation a couple of hundred miles away to meet a couple on a date.
The scene was comical. The girl took one look at me and turned a brilliant shade of green. The boy even had the good grace to blush. Me? I was trying not to laugh. This wasn't a one-second encounter. This was a I'm-sorry-I-didn't-plan-things-this-way. The poor kids, they sat there in silence, perhaps conversing telapathically. I can just hear the conversation: "we should probably wait till she's not in earshot before we resume talking." "Yeah I was thinking the same thing!" "cool! Is this what they call chemistry?"
Personally I was sending them telapathic messages too, "don't worry. I don't know you. Really, I don't know anyone who lives her, you are safe. It's ok."
I don't think they got the message. They just sat there in their awkward silence, willing me to disappear. I didn't, but I do like to imagine that they went on to get engaged, and married, and eventually have 15 kids. I like to imagine the kids sitting around the shabbos table, and little Yanky saying "tatty, can you tell us the story of how you were on a first date with mommy and this weird girl was there and you were so embarrassed?" Then little Rivkala chimes in "yes, tatty, can you PLEASE say it!" Not to be outdone, Sarah Leah says "Tatty, PLEASE? it's my favorite story!" So Tatty sighs, and starts the story... "Well, kinderlach, you see, before mommy was married, she lived in [insert name of mildly popular vacation area] and I went up there to go on a date with her. I picked her up, but things weren't going too well. We didn't have too much to talk about. But then we went down to the water and there was this strange girl there. I'm not sure exactly what made her strange, but she was laughing too much. Anyway, mommy and me didn't talk while she was around, which was a while. But as soon as she left we burst out laughing, and that was the beginning of things. Now we're married with 15 kids, so I guess it all worked out."
"But tatty, what ever happened to the girl?" questions little Hindy. "I don't know zeeskeit, but I'm pretty sure she forgot all about it."

Either way, that's not the only time I bumped into dating couples. Once, I was stuck in traffic, we're talking non-moving FDR kind of misery, and I found it pretty amusing that a majority of the time I was parallel to a couple that was no doubt on a date. They didn't look to thrilled about me staring into their car for an hour, or maybe they simply weren't thrilled with each other. I was thinking that he looked like a very eligible young man (or perhaps he was simply driving a very eligible new car) and maybe it would be a good idea for me to roll down my window and let him know I'm available. I took pity on the poor girl though, and remained content sitting looking into their car and analyzing the situation.

On another occasion, my sisters and I went out to eat. Just as we walked into the restaurant, my sister's face lit up in a special way. "Splendid. That's my friend, and she is obviously on a date." the guy got up, and the girl beckoned my sister to come to her table. "This guy is SO not for me, I can't wait till this date is over." Personally, I found it funny. Why did the guy waste his money taking her to such a fancy restaurant so early on, before he knows if she's worth all that money? I wonder if it wasn't as bad as the girl made it seem. Perhaps she was just embarrassed at the situation, and figured that statement was the surest way to make sure that we wouldn't publicize our little meeting.

My sister had a great story along these lines. She was on a date, and they met another dating couple in the park they were walking in. The couple looked extra radiant, and they confided in my sister and her Prince Not-So-Charming. "We just got engaged!! The two of you are the first to know about it!!!" My sister and her date congratulated them, and then it got awkward. The girl looked at my sister with searching eyes. They were asking "and you two?" My sister tried to signal back with her eyes, to let her know that Miss Kallah might be in the company of Mr. Right, but MG's date was sadly Mr. Wrong.

What do you do when you meet a couple on a date? Ignore them? Pretend you don't realize it's a date? (i.e. ask how they know each other)
Have you had any great stories when this happened?

13 comments:

thatsme said...

How about when you bump into another couple while you are on a date?!
That could be fun or awkward depending on the guy you are going out with...
Once, when I bumped into a couple while I was on a date (and I knew the girl and she knew me), we walked around the lounge area (it was a small place - d'u know the Ritz Carlton in Manhattan? near Battery Park...) then we sat down in a place where they couldn't see us...and then by the time we got up to leave, the other date had left already!!
Then, when I was on a date, this guy from I-don't-know-where (he had an accent, I think he was from South Africa or something) started asking us all these questions, like why he sees so many 'couples' together in this place...all dressed up...are they dating? married? it was actually verrry funny cuz we were on a date and the guy I was going out with explained how the whole dating thing works!! I was laughing the whole way through!!

harry-er than them all said...

guys take girls to restaurants early because they are hungry. lol

or at least something good will come out of the date

thinking out loud said...

I was once in a park with a few friends and we met a couple on a date whom we did not know.
As soon as they saw us, they split up and kept walking separately till a more distant area, where we wouldn't be able to see them...

anon#1 said...

My friend once went to a park with a bunch of friends, and she saw her brother there with his date. He didn't notice her, as she made sure to keep her group far enough away, but she took whatever pictures she could from that distance. Luckily, he got engaged to her a few days later, and she was able to show her pics to him!

nmf #7 said...

Heh. When Mr. NMF and I were dating , a neighbor (girl) of his was also going out. They both nodded to each other when they saw each other while dating. Both couples got married. Guess seeing each other date didn't hurt anything.

Anonymous said...

when i was younger there was this one hotel we used to always stop at on the way home from new york when my father got to tired to drive. we dubbed it the "dating hotel" because there was always at least 3 frum couples in the lobby on dates. once I sat there and just watched the entire date. i don't think they noticed me much, partically cuz i was 10 :P

David_on_the_Lake said...

I once went on a tour of one of these grand ol Hudson Valley Mansions...
And lo and behold..the tour consisted of me and my wife and a couple on a date..and of course the middle aged tour guide that thought she was a riot..
What an awkward hour..the poor guy was trying so hard to impress her...and she clearly was having the worst date of her life...

jb said...

My husband and I go out on "dates" every now and then, and there usually is a classic shidduch-date couple at one of the other tables. We take "bets" on what number date they're on, how far it will go, etc. Of course, since we don't know the people, we can't actually confirm that they got engaged and married, or broke up the next day or whatever, but it's still a fun game that we play while we're waiting for our dinner to be served.

halfshared said...

I bump into other dates all the time. I think it's fun meeting people! Almost every single time I went out, I bumped into someone I know. It's just part of life.
I tell myself that there's nothing to be embarrassed about; I'm not doing anything wrong.

Some guys get all excited when they meet their friends and they start talking and joking with them, and some did turn colors and tried to walk the other way. Whatever they chose to do was cool with me.

Something Different said...

TM- That's funny about the guy with the accent. I always wondered what outsiders think about frum dates...

HTTA- That doesn't explain taking them to an expensive restaurant. Why blow 150 dollars on a girl who you aren't gonna marry anyway? It's painful enough to blow ten bucks on cokes. (At least IMO.)

TOL- That's pathetic. It's not like they were doing something wrong!

Anon- Shame for her though. If not, she could have blackmailed her brother, threatening to put the pics on only simchas. ;-)

NMF- It probably doesnt usually hurt. I think it's more of an embarrassment that passes quick. Or else a good topic for conversation. ;-)

Anon- omg thats really funny! Next time I go on a date I will watch out for ten year olds. :-p

DOTL- Oh gosh, it was similar in my first story. We couldn't just leave. I think things like that make bad dating venues...no?

JB- Well, next time dare your husband to go up to them and ask them! :-D

HS- Unless your date turns out to be a an obvious creep, then it is embarrassing, huh? ;-)

BigChamor21 said...

"But then we went down to the water and there was this strange girl there. I'm not sure exactly what made her strange, but she was laughing too much."

AWESOME

Mushkie said...

Can you put that stry into your fiction blog (remember that thing???)? It made me laugh :D.

Something Different said...

BC- ;-) Glad you liked. Btw, I don't always laugh as much as I do when I am on the phone with you, but you wouldn't know that. :-P

Mushkie- Awesome! You gave me a great idea! :-D