Excuses, Excuses Excuses!

A man was driving down the highway in his brand new Jaguar. He was rather proud of it, and perhaps showed his pride with a heavy foot. Suddenly there is a policeman pulling off the side of the road, following behind him. A couple seconds later, and there are lights and sirens coming at him from the rear. Ignoring his common sense, he decided to test the powers of his Jag. He floored it, glancing in his rearview mirror the entire time. He was shocked, horrified and just plain scared to discover that the police car was keeping up the chase. Finally, the man realized he was beat. With a heavy heart, he pulled over to the side of the road, and waited for his moment of jedgement. 

The police came to his car, and gave him a look. The man's terror increased a bit, if possible. The policeman began, "Listen Buddy. It's the end of my shift. I have had a long and monotonous day. You give me an excuse for the stupidity you have just desplayed that I have never heard before, and I will let you off, scott free." 

The man looked squarely at the cop and said "Well sir, twenty years ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. I was afraid you were bringing her back."

The policeman smiled. "Have a good day!"

I said this joke over to my family, and got a laugh out of everyone, including my father, who never laughs at jokes. After I was made to repeat it for the third time, I realized that, as with all great humor, there must be some truth to it. When I saw this list of speeding ticket jokes, I concluded that I had to write about it.

You see, human nature is all about making excuses. Does anybody ever get pulled over and say "I am sorry officer. I was being stupid"? Not that I know of. Either they are late to pick somebody up from the airport, the store is closing in five minutes. Sometimes it's a funeral they are late for, other times it is a wedding. Sometimes their son is gushing blood at home and other times they simply need the bathroom.  

There are also more ridiculous excuses, such as "Well of course I was on my cell phone! People kept calling me!" Or, "That was a stop sign?!" Or, "Isn't the speed limit 75 over here?" 

Either way, human nature has it that we make these excuses. We sound dumb, but we do it anyway. It isn't our fault! It can't be! Anyone else's fault, but surely not I.

So I am headed to traffic court tomorrow. I could try to explain away my ticket, but the truth is...I don't see why I should. It was my fault. I was speeding. 

That being said, any advice on traffic courts?